Archive | Book Excerpts RSS feed for this section

Happy New Year, NewNewYorkers!

1 Jan

Anyone go to Times Square to ring in 2011? See anything crazy (besides people absolutely jamming their tongues down each other’s throats? Ew.) Here’s to new beginnings on those crazy New York streets.

I choose this post today because your first “wtf was THAT?” experiences on the city streets are moments that say, “We’re not in [wherever you moved from] anymore.” This is an excerpt from my memoir, Two Years in New York City:

Today I saw the craziest thing I’ve seen since moving here two months ago.

So I’m walking west on 36th Street to my grocery store, which is on Third Avenue. On the other side of the block, I saw a man with a DEAD DEER HEAD STRAPPED TO HIS CHEST. You know, one of those trophy heads that are usually hanging on a wall? It’s strapped to his chest like a baby harness or something.

I saw a shoe hanging from a tree once. It wasn't that weird.

I saw a shoe hanging from a tree once. It wasn't that weird.

He was holding a video camera, filming himself walking, presumably to make it look like the deer was trotting through Manhattan. Maybe that wasn’t what he was doing at all, but it’s safe to say we will never know. The important thing to note is that he had a giant, antlered cranium attached to his pectorals.

I laughed out loud, and so did the girl walking a few steps behind me. I kind of wished I’d turned around and smiled, just to share the moment with…someone.

Oh, New York. J’taime.

The man waving his arms, stomping his feet, and making Pterodactyl noises in the Union Square subway last night? Close second.

You can tell how new here I was when I wrote this — because I WAS NOT WALKING WEST. I was walking east; I was coming from Madison. As a newcomer, I didn’t have my bearings, but I left it in as written. (I also definitely would not have known how to spell Pterodactyl. Cheers, my book editor.)

I would love to hear about your awesomely crazy Streets of New York experiences in the comments.


2-for-1 holiday book sale! W00t!

16 Dec

Stumped for a gift idea and still trying to explain to your family and friends back home exactly why you wanted to move here so much?

I’m having a big two-for-one sale on my book, Standing Room Only: Two Years in New York City, from now until Dec. 23. Give one as a present, keep one for yourself!

Every book comes signed and personalized, with same-day shipping.

Here is an interview I did with Ask Wendy earlier this year, and here is a review of sorts from a devoted reader of NewNewYorkers.

More about SRO:

Writer/editor Sarah Protzman arrived in New York City at age 24 with no job, no apartment and no idea which way was uptown. Standing Room Only: Two Years in New York City comprises select impressions, written as they happened, about the piecing together of a life from the ground up.

Your five favorite posts

30 Oct

1. Your first NYC winter: Are you pumped or what?

2. Don’t move to Brooklyn

3. Frugal Find #2: An apartment in Manhattan

4. Stuff that’s cheaper in NYC than where you live now

5. We are all at summer camp

Did you favorite not make the list? Which was it?